Ch-ch-ch-ch-Changes....

I wrote a while back that I was looking at other formats, I think the time has come.
It's very tempting to keep it under wraps until it's all polished and I know my way around the format but what the hell, life's too short and (dare I say it) it's only a blog!
So, hopefully I can be found here. I hope to get it looking better soon.

Advice and comments on using this format are most welcome especially from those further down the Wordpress path than I am.

Thanks for all the page views xx

New Year Thoughts...

In this year...

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
the courage to change the things I can;
and the wisdom to know the difference.

One of THOSE neighbours....

I have a Linden home.

Some time back when where and with whom I would live was all a bit up in the air, Linden launched the free-homes-for-premium-members scheme and I reasoned that it compared well with renting and I’d never risk the landlady going AWOL or just plain evicting me.

Linden homes are good. If you like modern housing and estate living that is low maintenance they are great and have some nice little touches too. But if you’ve read much of this blog you’ll know that my housing whims have ranged from Dutch Ponder House, through New Orleans French Colonial, a Castle and currently a Greek Villa. However a change is always nice and I do occasionally use my Linden home – the contrast is refreshing.

Now, I treat “set home” as my ultimate security blanket – the kind of rez point that, if all my clothes fell off in an embarrassing social set-up (although what would still count as embarrassing here I no longer know) I could hastily tp home and reclaim my dignity in private. Consequently, I tend to set landing points indoors.

Although it definitely has a summer holiday feel to it, we decided to do some minimal Christmas decoration at the villa. I knew I had a reasonable tree inventoried away somewhere but I couldn’t locate it and anyway, Bram found a nice one so I forgot about it.

The other day, I rezzed in my Linden home, I had a little time to spare so thought I’d take a stroll outside. When I got the place it was on the edge of the development but recently I have become the hill to the valley below (I keep getting mental flashes from Poltergeist and hope the green pit beyond my window doesn’t start yielding skeletons). Imagine my surprise on opening my front door to find my Christmas tree on my lawn!! It must have been there all year – what must the neighbours think.

Sitting on the Quayside.....

.....at Penny Lane with my friend Shane.
Just a nice hour spent chatting.

Friends, Acquaintances and the Rest.... Part II

My friend Seren (yes, not often spoken to, but I definitely consider her that) has, as always, pushed my thinking on a notch.

I was going to put this in as a reply to her comment but realised I was heading into fresh ground.

I will confess to writing that piece in a fit of pique, specifically about someone that praises my friendship but about whom I only ever get updates about through another mutual friend.

I think Seren has pinned the issue down. In a previous avatar I used to spend my time mainly with one extended group, chat was more often in local than IM, my social group was wider than my list. I had no need to ping them at a distance as we generally all hung out in the same place.

In my roleplaying days too, most interaction took place in local and was location-based (although the relationships were of varying impact)

Now, 3¼ years old and in my 3^rd incarnation, my S/L usage is different. I am more of a butterfly, less based in one hangout, less trusting of local as I’ve seen a few griefing tricks played on people and know there can be a darkness to S/L.

Advice given to me in my 1^st few weeks of S/L by one of those enduring friends to keep it in IM because “you never know who is listening” still rings in my ears and I tend to use local for things I would be happy to shout on a crowded train (except I behave better than that on trains – honest!).

Where Seren’s comment took me into new territory was this; I believe that our S/L personas are very much our R/L ones. I know some people claim to adopt something different but I feel that our innate character sooner or later shines through warts and all.

In R/L I am NOT good at the girly side of friendship.

Guys, you can ring a mate up you’ve not seen in a while, go for a beer and all is well. 

In my understanding female friendships need upkeep, nurturing, and constant work. I’m not good at all that and the friendships that I do have tend to be with like-minded people.

To complete the circle, do I bring this behaviour with me into S/L? Of course, I’m sure I do – it’s part of “me”.

Any readers may hark back to the quiet friend who prompted this and shout “double-standard” “jealousy” at me. I’m no saint but I don’t think so in this case. 

Double-standard – am I criticising another for examples of my own behaviour? I don’t think so. I don’t wish to identify him here so will not explain further but the pattern is not consistent.

Jealous – no. I’d be happier had I never been flagged as anything special to be honest.

Now I’m off to sharpen my list-pruning axe.

Friends, Acquaintances and the Rest....

You have a very pleasant half hour chatting to someone, lots of common ground, good chat, nice bond. At some point the “Would you be my fwend” issue occurs to one of you (although the phrase probably not uttered since infants school and, Lindens please note, sooo needs changing) and another friend is added.

Friends/contacts lists – call it what you will, that big list that appears in the communicate box.

I got ruthless with mine not long ago but it’s crept up to 50+ again, looking down it aspects of “who is THAT?” start to come to mind especially with the copperplate leet names.

You would think that with a list that length, so recently pruned, that my chat tabs are buzzing, that I never have a moment to myself – not so. Like many have remarked S/L can often be an empty place and although there may be friends who claim you among their closest, they never ping unless you do first – sound familiar?

I guess the analogy is Facebook where similar lumpen lists can easily appear. I recently took an axe to my Facebook list – who fell....

• Anyone I couldn’t remember who they are,
• Anyone who was only there by association (ie someone’s ex boyfriend)
• People whose posts wind me up (can’t use language, are offensive*, make racist or homophobic posts),
• People who never ever interact with me/my comments/posts or anything else

I was left with a list of people I felt good about, people I had met and/or interact with in some way.

I really need to embed that ruthlessness into S/L

How would I categorise my current S/L list?

• A few gold standard friends who have been with me since the early days, re-friended by me through all my avatars, some have currently dormant accounts but they will stay.
• A few friends who claim me as close but whom I only hear about from others
• One-time introductions, store owners typically
• Recently added people who have not yet passed the test of time
• The now and then friends, people I used to roleplay with but who I catch up with from time to time after big gaps, the kind that I am there for them and they are for me.

If I look at the rest and think “Would I pay the cost of a stamp to post these people a Christmas card in R/L?” and the answer is no....then I guess that’s my answer

 

*ie moreso than me!

Oooops!.......

ALWAYS lock your house
ALWAYS go to a sandbox to build

On the plus side, I'd never learned to re-position doors before

A Good Read....

Thanks to Gracie Kendal for putting this my way, some good pieces

Changes.....

When we met, Bramble lived in a simple but lovely whitewashed Greek house on a Sim that perfectly summed up the feeling of August on a Greek Island.
Sadly the Sim closed.
Way back then I was having a tough time but I have very fond memories of time spent in that house during which I found out what a lovely kind, caring man Bram is.
The Castle is lovely, great fun and beautifully made but at over 600 prims, furnishing etc was always a juggling act.
That, coupled with a love of Greece, a fancy for change and a desire for a bit more prim-flexibility took us on a search for a Greek Villa.
I landscaped over the weekend and placed the key components.
Much more to be done but here is the story so far.

The Crooked House...

Fly in the Ointment....

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The compile time user.agent value (opera) does not match the runtime user.agent value (unknown). Expect more errors".

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Hmmmmm, always a fly in the ointment!
I LIKE Opera, I LIKE this blog format, I certainly don't wish to get any deeper into Google's files, they have enough!!
Either the blog or the browser needs to change.
I'm open to suggestions here people.

Fun.....

As Autumn Approaches...

It’s been a while since I last posted here and to be honest, a lot has been going on in my R/L.

The issue that provoked the “worm-turning” post, thankfully resolved, or at least on the pathway and as it’s summer I’ve been off having some fun and catching up with friends too.

I’m not sure what the Autumn holds; as it’s back to work for me I guess it’s also back to falling asleep at the keyboard “Hellooooo, are you there, anyone awake?” being a large part of my late-night conversation – I’ve had whole dialogues with Bram with us each dozing between sentences! Now the adult in me chides “Don’t be silly woman – get some sleep!” but at that hour of the night my inner child is in control and screaming “No nap!! No nap!!” like an overtired two-year-old.

I realised I’ve been in the Tree-Castle a year now, do I want to stay? Do I use the land or just need the prims? Could I remodel so we get more use from the place? I’m certainly getting very prim-picky and of course on that front there are all the new tech developments. I wouldn’t call myself a builder but I have built a few things – perhaps enough of a toe in the water to realise the enormity of what I DON’T know. I DO know there are changes afoot in the tech side of stuff and I’ve spent enough time doing “just one more edit” to see exactly what this is driving at.

I do know one thing, being a creature of habit, I tend to cruise the same haunts – I need some new ones so I’ll be doing some showcase and profile raiding and hopping around a bit, all suggestions welcome.

Worm-turning Day...

I try to see the best in people.
Ok I'm not naive, no doormat, but when people disappoint I'm the one making excuses for them, trying to smooth things over, giving space, chances for the right thing to happen.
I won't bore anyone with the details but tonight (R/L) I had my wake up call. I reached the point of no excuses, no space.....see, it was my turn to be walked over, my goodwill thrust back at me and without detail, it hit me in a most vulnerable place.
I am deeply pissed off.
In the absence of chocolate I've had to make do with gin.
So, a new me dawns - now I look after me, my interests - time to be selfish, no longer on the receiving end of the selfishness of others - let THEM do the "understanding", the making of allowances (for me!)

Inventory Offer From....

I was intrigued and had to log on to see..

...even more puzzled I thought I had been sent a picture of the stink monster from Spirited away

...then I remembered the conversation...


Ooo u look weird
Me :?
Hair, clothes, and weirldy eyeballs!!!! but no skin

Second Life - wonderful place!!

Gripes....

At the risk of sounding a bit pissy (Oh WTF – it’s my blog anyway!), there are a few things that are bugging me atm.

Now that we can choose names seeing who is online is becoming a bit of a minefield!

First you have the hieroglyphics that gravitate to the top of your list – thankfully I only have a few of these and can remember who they are.

Then you have the completely enigmatic – “Remembrance of Things Past.....is online” flashing on-screen really? Am I going to look up a profile to work out who that is?

Then you have the ones who started with a “normal” name, change to a normal name....but then change again to another unrelated normal name, each permissible time-frame!

I had an instance last week where a very old friend wanted to test out a kidnap anim. His chat tab gave his regular name, while I was waiting for him to accept my teleport this guy started chatting to me. Before I could do my “waiting for my friend” bit, I realised it was my friend – confused? Sure was!

While I’m on a rolling rant, another thing that bugs me (and yes, I realise I may upset a friend or two here but, hell, it’s just my view right?)

You are having a quiet evening somewhere, a blue box pops up for a club event, you dismiss it...

        ...THEN...

                  ...within seconds, group chat splatters the same thing across your viewing screen! Really guys, I want to stay in touch with events......BUT!!

Confession...

Please don't laugh at this but I killed a spider.

I hate spiders, they freak me out in varying degrees according to size and movement and I can tell you that a very large spider avatar reduced me to a quivering wreck on a couch in S/L once.
Having said all that, I don't kill them. There are 2 reasons for this.

1. I don't kill things, not earwigs, not ants (no, not even when they grow wings and swarm), well ok, maybe I don't count mosquitos in this but I don't kill other things.
2. My partner has a big issue with spiders being killed (an ancient family story of his which I respect) and he is consequently more than happy to escort them to safety. In fact I can't remember killing a spider since I met him until now.

There was one on the bedroom ceiling the other day, on approach the crafty thing dropped like a stone, as they do. "It's gone" he said "It bloody well isn't!" I thought.

Well my rescuer is not here and it, or one of it's brethren, just showed up. On the floor? the ceiling? across the room? Nooooo of course not. On the bedside table that abutts my mattress, inches from my elbow. Long front leg-type too so I knew there wouldn't be much time (and I didn't have my wine glass and postcard kit to hand). There was a mug nearby and......well it's done. I would have preferred putting it outside but knew if it ran, I couldn't sleep in my bed   - it or me! I still feel bad though.

Welcome to Immersion.......

You are watching a fim on TV......
It reaches one of those black-cat-in-a-coal-hole moments where you can't see what's going on.....
You reach for the remote......
World > Environment Settings > Midday ......

......Oh!!! :(

Stats...

I read someone's advice a long while back that said not to enable stats because they would be frustrating, it didn't bother me like that as I'm always surprised when people read this anyway, writing it more for me than you I'm afraid.
I think the stats are quite interesting and although I know that coutry shown does not necessarily mean the same as viewer location, I have been fascinated to see the countries that appear - seeing China come up was a real buzz.
Anyway, today the page views turned into 4 figures which I find that amazing in the 9 months this has been up.
So, whatever insomniac meanderings have brought our paths to cross, hello and it's been good to meet you.

"I like your dress"......

......and so it began.

That was exactly 2 years ago today.

There have been the usual hiccups, the normal things, but we talk – carefully, attentively and with care and mutual respect – it works, it’s still working and I’m very very happy.